oldest bar, Mary's Place.
I sit in the cool late August evening feeling the cool breeze off the river on my sweaty shoulders.
The bar is at capicity, the bouncers furiously working their people counting clickers. The noise is defening. I cannot find the friends that I came to meet. I sit here and wonder why?
I believe I know why for the musicians. Music is in their blood and bones, they have to play. It's in their soul. Plus, it pays their bills and supports their families. I love all the guys playing this evening and their beautiful supportive wives.
This isn't about them, this is about me. My why.
Tonight reinforced my personal choices and provided my tipping point. "Out" in a bar with 300 people I don't know and bartenders who are overworked is not where I want to be
I want to be home, with no make up on and my hair in a bun. I want to have my children safely tucked into bed at a reasonable hour. I want to snuggle on the couch with H.C. and discuss the philosophical theory of dreams versus reality.
I have not gone "out" in a year. I will not go "out again.
Cheers to never again having my hand stamped by a bouncer collecting my cover charge.